if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
