I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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