yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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