am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
