I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
