Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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