Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize
