how can u be prego again
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
