Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Who died my cat blue again?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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