I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Randomize
