in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
you would pick up someone in the library
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
this will be a night to untag.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize