oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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