I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
