biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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