ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
