Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
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