I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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