the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
