she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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