your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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