you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
