White coat. Heels.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
