When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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