before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
