She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
