you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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