Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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