There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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