p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize