Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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