my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
