Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
