i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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