Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize