The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize