So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
