Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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