normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
