i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
you made out with another girl for some wings
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
