just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize