Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
