I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
