Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Shitshow foam night was such a success
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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