I'm eating all of the evidence.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Randomize