covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize