dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize