Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
