girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize