We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
