you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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